More by Miztrezboo

Disclaimer - SM's playground and I'm literally playing on the swings with Bella and Jasper.. JUST for Ang...

Happy Birthday you sweet ass Shiela! STONE THE CROWS and FLAMING HELL and YOU BLOODY BEWDY! .. that enough aussie-isms for you mah love? xoxo

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"MORE"

I kicked my feet in the dregs of bark and dirt in the dip beneath me. The once shiny black of my toenail polish and startlingly white feet was now covered in a fine dusty film of brown from shifting the dry earth backward and forward for the past hour or so. The crickets had started chirping loudly, signifying the days last breath finally leaving as night claimed the area around us.

"Do you think Ben and Chris ever talked to him about it? Or did they just ignore the fact that Neon Ballroom was like Daniel's diary at the time?"

I groaned loudly, dropping my chin down onto my chest as I pushed off on the pads of my feet a little harder. The old swing creaked with the harsh movement, echoing loudly in the now silent playground.

"Jasper," I sighed, wrapping my elbows around the chains so I could rub at my eyes with the heel of my hands.

"Come on, B," he pushed. Always with the pushing, whether it was physically or mentally, he always pushed.

I leaned back, letting my arms stretch out so the whole sky filled my eyeline. It was well past twilight now. The sky had turned that in-between shade of violet and navy blue. The street lights were flickering on one by one and I knew in about an hour - give or take - I'd sure to be hearing Momma Whitlock calling for Jasper to come inside. Which in turn, my own easily sidetracked mother would hear and echo Momma W's sentiments under five minutes later.

"J, are we really going to have this conversation again?" I asked with a distinct whine in my tone.

"Humor me, B."

"What's black and white and red all over?"

I felt a bump on my left side from where Jasper had obviously not found my joke amusing. Our swings suddenly ceased their to and fro and started moving side to side from his action.

I sighed, "Fine, yes I do think that they knew something was up. Look at Emotion Sickness or Ana's song... especially Ana's song. Daniel was so open about what he was going through. 'On my knees for you' wasn't exactly talking about him wanting to suck cock, J."

He groaned, "Why must you always bring his sexual orientation into it, B?"

"Why must we always discuss hidden meanings in Chair songs, J? I mean..." I jumped up off the swing and started pacing on the uneven lumps of grass and dirt that remained from years of kids trampling across the parks surface. The same old same old, this was beyond frustrating how predictable our conversations had become.

I watched from the corner of my eye as he pulled his tall, lanky frame up. He swung one long Khaki short covered leg over the swing, straddling the tiny seat and rocked back and forth, his eyes trained on my every frustrated move.

"B-- " he started but I held up my hand for him to stop. I couldn't stop the agitated feeling inside of me, I wanted to figure out what I wanted to say and couldn't do that sitting down. I needed to walk things out to work them out. Which he really should know by now, considering we‘d been friends since the fifth grade.

The night air swirled around us both as I continued walking to and fro, attempting to organize the words in my head into some sort of sentence or form. Finally, J had had enough.

"B, sit." He patted the swing beside him and, considering my pacing had gotten me nowhere, I followed his lead and tramped back to my original spot, straddling the seat to face him.

He reached over, taking one of my hands, flipping it over and tracing his usual odd patterns over my skin. I felt the tension of my misplaced thoughts drifting away under his touch. His repetitive movements allowed my mind to still, my eyes however continued to roam over the familiar form in front of me. His golden curls, an almost ghostly blue hue now that the moon had risen, ruffled with what was the first cool breeze we'd had all day. Loose coils whipped over his brow, drawing my attention to how intently he was following his fingers' trailing path with his eyes.

"It's what we do, B." Jasper's low tone brought me back to the present, "We finish our homework, wait for the playground to empty before we take over our swing set and a have a few relaxing cones, then we discuss music. It's just the way we are," he finished with a shrug, the tattered bowling shirt that had once belonged to his father slipped off his left shoulder with the movement. The white of his thin wifebeater made his already dark tanned skin from hours repainting the exterior of Mrs. Copes' two story house over the summer really stand out.

"It's us," he paused licking his lips and shifting his eyes up to meet mine. The grey blue stood out even in the little light there was from the full moon rising behind me. The normal whites were criss-crossed with thin fiery red lines, a sign that we’d yet again have to make use of the Visine I had stored in the hidden compartment of my rucksack. I sighed again - finding myself doing that a lot this afternoon - maybe it was the weed that was making me all antagonistic tonight. Or maybe I was just bored.

I flipped my hand over, pressing my palm against his and pressed the pads of my fingers in a game of push and pull with his own. "Don't you ever get tired of this, J?"

"Tired of what, B?

"This, us," I paused, leaning back, the cool metal chain met my mostly naked back, echoing the links in my spine. It felt wonderful against my steamy skin apart from where the knot of my red bikini top pressed against me uncomfortably in my new seating arrangement.

"Don't you think there's something... more?" I lifted my feet from the ground and allowed Jasper's movements to rock our swings back and forth, a few tendrils from my long ponytail getting caught in the chain links pulling painfully against my scalp now and then.

Jasper was silent in front of me as I tilted my head skyward. The inky black night was littered with familiar blinking lights of constellations I barely could make out. The Big Dipper was the only one I could ever really find, but tonight it was hiding behind the only white puffy cloud in the sky. Jasper's quiet was something I knew from being best friends for over seven of my seventeen years on this earth meant that he was thinking. Thinking hard at that.

"Of course there's more, B. Fuck we've got our whole Senior year ahead of us, we've got to finish painting your room, I still have to get you up on my board and standing in the surf, there's what colleges we're gonna check out in the fall. There's prom and whether your meathead cousin will actually be able to form more than a Neanderthal grunt when they crown him and his bimbo girlfriend Queen."

I chuckled, imagining Emmett throwing Rose over his shoulder and banging his chest if he actually did have to do that speech. Little did J know that Em had already spoken to and paid Edward, one of the tech geeks, to write a speech and display it on a prompter if he won. Jasper waited till I stopped laughing before his long guitar plucking fingers wrapped around my wrist, pulling me forward and then continued. "Of course there's more, B. But I like discussing music with you. I like hearing what you have to say even if it is an argument we've had over and over before."

His free hand moved on top of my knee, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into the soft denim of my cuttoffs. The wooden seats we were straddling lost their momentum as he pulled himself closer to me. His long legs wrapping around my own so my knees were now between them. I could smell the paint thinner, cinnamon gum and the still faint oceany scent from his sunrise surf this morning as his forehead touched mine. The tip of my nose brushed against his and our warm breaths mingled between us.

"B, I could never get tired of listening to you. I love the sound of your voice," he whispered, his voice taking on a husky tenor that echoed the serious shade of dark blue his eyes had become. My heart skipped a few beats as I felt the air surrounding us change. This conversation had taken a decidedly different turn and I wasn't sure how to take it. He loved the sound of my voice? He enjoyed our arguments? This was still us talking as friends... wasn't it?

"I love that little line that forms, right here," he paused, his hand leaving mine to press softly on my bottom lip. "When you press your lips together, it let's me know your brain is working over time trying to figure something out." The pads of the two fingers he was using to demonstrate this knowledge moved softly, almost hesitantly back and forth against my skin, sending chills down my spine and lit a fire I never knew existed in the pit of my stomach.

"I love that I seem to finally have found something to shut you up for a change. A subject in which you have no quick come back," he laughed, a little too like his nervous laugh that I only ever heard when he was called upon in our Drama class; he was a terrible actor.

"I've been meaning to say this all summer, hell before that," he chuckled again and I finally found the strength to stop watching his hand on my knee with wonder - which felt so very different than our usual friendly touches - and lift my eyes back to his.

"Say what, J?" My voice sounded weird even to my ears, being quiet for so long had dried my throat and the words, as simple as they were, appeared to stick.

He blinked once, then twice fast. His head moved closer, his hand on my knee traveled up my thigh and onto my hip, pulling me toward him. The fingers that had stilled their brushing over my lip, moved along my jaw, his large hand cupping the back of my neck as his thumb brushed the apple of my cheek. Nose to nose we now were, the tip of his sliding up and down the side of mine, his breath cool on my rapidly heating skin as it left his nostrils in loud, quick bursts.

I felt the heat of his lips above my own, one of his deep blue eyes met mine for a second, a blink and then...

Jasper kissed me.

Rough, dry skin pressed against the soft cocoa butter smeared, supple softness of my own. I felt his breath rush in and out. I couldn't hear much else apart from the stuttering staccato of my own heart at this... new development. His tongue darted out, flickering for a sign of welcome between my lips. I opened my mouth and let him in. Tasting, touching, testing, caressing and more... I wanted more and the realization of this had my hands moving to his chest, clutching at his lapels and pulling him closer. I cursed the chains that kept me from feeling him completely against me.

It never once entered my head the entire time he was kissing me - and I was kissing him - that this might not be something I wanted to explore. Yes, Jasper was my friend - my best friend at that - surely this couldn't be too bad. Moving from friend to girlfriend wouldn't change us too much, would it? Our relationship was strong enough to withstand such a simple joining of words from girl and friend to girlfriend?

Or was this just the weed talking? Was this kiss just... too much sun and Cottage Blue paint fumes affecting J's head?

And even if that was the case... what was my excuse for my fingertips now sliding over the smooth skin of his shoulders, caressing the satiny feel of his muscles and tendons under my hands?

Jasper was right. I did talk too much, even in my own narrative inside my head.

He pulled back at that moment, both of our chests moving rapidly in and out as we fought to catch our breaths. I blinked a few times, maybe a few more and then felt my face changing, an almost stupid smile breaking out from ear to ear.

The corner of his mouth turned up and his breath came rushing out along with three words that would irrevocably change everything between us.

"I love you."

I nodded, biting my lip and felt the echoing sentence bubble up from my heart and I opened my mouth to return them when...

"JASPER MONROE WHITLOCK IT'S TIME YOU COME INSIDE NOW YA HEAR!"

And five seconds later...

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! IT'S TIME YOU SET THE TABLE!"

Jasper rested his forehead against mine, laughter coming easy and free between us both at the predictable timing of our parental units. He stood up first, then offered me his hand. My hand always felt tiny in his, holding hands was something we always had done... yet this time it felt different. He twirled his arm around my shoulders, so my hand was now across my chest and still tightly encompassed in his and as we wandered across the empty playground I felt his lips at my temple for a moment.

I lay my head against the side of his chest, smiling at the sound of his still rapid heart beat. I wanted more, now it looked like I'd gotten it.

"You still can't tell me that Diorama isn't their greatest album, B."

I groaned, pushing my hip into his side as we staggered a little through the gate and back onto the street.
"You're kidding right, J? You really want to get me started on the lines from some of those songs? The fungus in my milk? You brighten my life like a polystyrene hat? I don't care what you say, the boys were obviously on a lot more drugs than you and I will ever take in our lifetime."

Maybe I didn't need more, maybe the more was just sitting on a swing beside me, waiting for an opportunity.

"And J, I love you too."